My Newsletter for the month of June gained impressive traction. ย More than any of my previous works, people actually went out of their way to share their thoughts and appreciate how the work resonates with them. The comments I received were overwhelmingly heart-warming, with some even suggesting that it could be my best piece yet. I was genuinely touched and I am very grateful to everyone who shared their kind words. Of course, amidst the positive feedback, there were also a few criticisms that provided insightful points for improvement. But of all the comments, the comment from a colleague whom I recently met during my court attachment program struck me the most.
She said: "Hi Ganiyyy, I read your piece, it was a great read. You are actually more remarkable in writing than in person."
My instinctive interpretation of this was with a tinge of negativity. Before I eventually sought clarification of what she meant, I found myself grappling on several possible meanings that comment intended to convey. Questions flooded my mind: "What could she have meant?" "Does she think I come across as foolish in person?" "Is she implying that she didn't expect such intellectual depth from me?" These doubts began to overshadow the joy I had felt from the overwhelmingly positive feedback, and I couldn't shake them off my mind.
I realized that for the first time, I did not feel insecure about the quality of my writing, it was more about what she thought of me. For a long period I approached writing with trepidation and self-doubt and often, I perceived my writing as mediocre. No matter how much I tried or how much time I spend working on a piece, the stories I told seem ramshackle, as though I hastily scrambled some jargon down. To me, my writing always seemed to lack that creative spark of brilliance that I admired in others' work. Even when "The Coconut Head Lover" was published and hailed by many as relatable and creative, I still felt insecure, doubting whether it was just a "fluke" and if I could meet the expectations of my audience.
In recent times, I no longer hold back from expressing myself through writing or sharing my thoughts. Now, I feel an instinctive impulse to write and document my mind. More than ever, my mind feels fertile with ideas waiting to germinate. I take pleasure in using writing as a means to explore the depths of my imagination. I have become an artist who can paint vivid portraits of love and romance with words gifting myself and others this experience through creative imagination and writing. I occasionally revisit my past writings and marvel at the elegance of my writing and the sheer brilliance of my ideas. I savor the vintage aesthetic of my expressions, and my vitals gets neuronal excitement. I marvel at how I manage to inject life into ordinary and tasteless stories.
Today I can say โwriting has changed my lifeโ and I wouldnโt flinch. Writing grants me the precious gift of alone-time, an opportunity for introspection and self-reflection. Through the lens of my words, I cross-examine my ideas, challenge my biases, and test the soundness of my thought-process. Itโs remarkable how my insecurity has shifted from fearing the quality of my writing to fearing whether I can truly live up to the ideals I articulate in my work. Importantly, writing has unveiled the remarkable depths of my mind and illuminated the incredible potential it holds. Today, I no longer feel petrified to publish my work or get concerned that I will lose my audience because of drop in the quality of my work. With each publication, I make ideation and writing look effortless, numbing the ridiculous time spent polishing each sentence and my obsession for โperfect sentenceโ.
Enough of the self-aggrandizement. The main point of this story is the tremendous growth that can occur within a short period. The turning point in my writing journey came when I stopped obsessing over whether I was naturally gifted and instead focused on how I could cultivate the necessary skills. Although I never had a passion for reading, I realized that without it, my writing would not progress. So, I began consuming quality writings, reading them with intentionality and consciousness analyzing their plot structure, literary devices, and expressive techniques used to highlight the focal point of their piece. I also started writing more, caring less about whether anyone would read it or not (mostly didnโt publish). Gradually, I watched my work progress from the vestigial elemental work to a sophisticated work of art someone flatteringly described as โremarkableโ.
The point is that growth is an accessible choice available to everyone, regardless of your starting point. The mentality is โif talent cannot do it, growth will!โ This empowering perspective reminds us that we are not confined by our current skill level. It's okay to be dissatisfied with your current abilities, but you would be doing yourself a disservice if you weren't interested in discovering how much growth can unlock your potential. So, let go of your fixation on talent or feedback, and instead let the pursuit of growth propel you closer to realizing your full potential. Every step taken towards growth and self-improvement is a step towards fulfilling that potential.
Perhaps I simply relish those fleeting moments of mind-blowing inspiration, and maybe there are days when I experience pure brilliance. I am acutely aware that they are merely a glimpse of what lies ahead. The world is yet to witness the full breadth and depth of my mind. With each passing day, I will continue to venture deep into the recesses of my mind, unearthing treasures of wisdom and brilliance that will leave an indelible mark on the world. Just maybe if I stay consistent, the world might witness a force of creativity and brilliance that transcends mere wordsโa symphony of thoughts that will captivate hearts, challenge minds, and leave an everlasting impression.
When I got the notification of this post, I was like I needed to be in a calmer state of mind to read what this great mind has written again.
This is beautiful indeed. I loved the progression and of course, the growth. I remember that I had a particular experience with one of my popular newsletters: I think I'm getting married and someone I really held in high esteem made criticism about the work but also encouraged me and I felt so down. All the good comments I had gotten seemed like specks of dust next to that comment. (it was made privately.) and since then, I've had this voice in my head that I need to do better. I need to grow myself more so that I can remain relevant and people will keep liking my work. I almost lost sight of why I started in the first place. I would criticize my every idea and tear out (in my case, delete from my notepad) the pages where I wrote my random ideas.
Most of my good works are the random and not really the ones I gave myself to overthinking.
I enjoy writing. It's an escape from the world and it actually helps me express myself better than the many words I could speak. But one thing I realized is that, I've grown so much from when I first started. I use words that come to my memory from reading so many books (reading helps to improve your vocabulary and writing skills) and I've mentally taken notes of courses and other things I need to improve myself in and grow more.
Today, I appreciate that person and that comment. It's easy to get comfortable in the constant praises of how good you're doing and how people love reading your work and be stuck in the same place you started. Growth is important. Growth is exactly what you need. GROWTH CAN DO IT! But in growing, don't lose sight of yourself. Keep on filling your mind with positive affirmations of your work and believe in work before anyone else does and you'd be on top.
I admire your writing skills and icl, if I had this skill of using imagery and other beautiful figures of speech, man, Iโd be so good.๐
I love your work so much and I love that you're striving to work harder and be better and grow more. Thank you for this. It encouraged me.๐ซ
Cheers to growth, Ganiyy.๐ค
I embraced growth during my institution days and I'm still growing..
It's a way to celebrate oneself